Dating in Second Life – 3 Things You Must Not Do

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Dating in Second Life – 3 Things You Must Not Do

Second Life is a virtual reality world which is used by people to meet others, create things, buy and sell items, work, try things out that they cannot in real life and basically create lives that mirror their dreams.

One of the biggest dreams a lot of people have is that of finding a love partner they can connect to on a deep level. In Second Life this can include having meaningful and deep romantic and sexual relationships. This is such a popular pastime that some of the most visited sites in Second Life are romantic clubs and hideouts.

But there are three things you must not do if you are thinking of dating someone, whether for a long term relationship or one night stand.

1. Not bother checking the person’s age.

There is no way to know someone’s age by their avatar. A 12 year old could be walking around in a fully adult looking avatar and a 50 year old can be in a 4 year old looking avatar. So how can you verify that the person is an adult and you are not about to commit pedophilia?

Right Click on the person’s avatar, go to Profile and see if they have the words, “Payment Info Used”. If they do, it means that the person has a credit card or other form of payment method linked to their account. Although never 100% certain, in most cases this will mean the person is an adult because most kids don’t have payment capabilities for their Second Life accounts.

Another way is to have a plot of land that you have configured to only allow age verified adults into. The Second Life age verification choice is not visible in the person’s profile, but they cannot enter a parcel that is age verified only. However, most people in second life never bother to age verify themselves in Second Life. I myself never bothered to do it. And if the person did not register payment information in their account, which is free and easy to do, then it is less likely they will not do the age verification. However, if you are serious about someone you can always ask them to do the payment and age verification so that you can have peace of mind. If they are serious about you, then they will be happy to do it.

2. Not verifying their real life gender.

I was quite surprised to find out that most of the players in Second Life are in fact men. Someone gave me and estimate of 80% men and 20% women. There is no way I can verify these numbers but I do know that there are men walking around as women and women walking around as men. I myself have met two men who were women in real life.

You might think that this is not important as long as the role play is accurate and you would not be the only one to feel this way. But many people would not like to fall in love with a man and then find out it was a woman, or make love to a woman and find out later on she was a man in real life.

If the other person’s gender really matters to you, then there is one possible way you can verify their real life gender. Ask for voice verification.

You can ask the person straight out if they are willing to verify their gender via voice. If they say no, then it is up to you to go ahead and date them or not. However, do take into account that there are voice generators out there that will change the person’s voice from male to female or female to male.

3. Not following your instinct.

Last, but not least, don’t ignore your instinct!

Like any situation in real life, your online experience will give you feedback that trigger red flags and green flags in you. If something doesn’t feel right, then it is not. If something does feel right then it is likely right.

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